gakuen heaven 2

Arata route translation

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the next day (continued)

(nurse's office)
swim club member: Then, I leave the rest to you.
Yuki: Right...
(Yuki: ...I'm useless.)
(Yuki: I was no help at all.)
(Yuki: I couldn't even help Arata-san or calmly make sure he wasn't hurt like the swim club members.)
(Yuki: I just hovered over him and called his name like an idiot.)
Yuki: Arata-san's hand...
Yuki: It's still cold...
(Yuki: I knew it, he was sick.)
(Yuki: Well, I thought he was vaguely off when I first saw him.)
(Yuki: Despite that, I just said things that pushed Arata-san.)
(Yuki: That time, if I'd forced him to rest, he wouldn't have fallen from there.)
(Yuki: Even though it was the place that Arata-san always easily jumped from...)
Arata: Ugh...
Yuki: Arata-san!?
Arata: ...Where am I...?
Yuki: Are you okay!? Please don't overdo it yet!!
Arata: The nurse's office... Did you carry me here?
Yuki: No. It was the swim club members.
Arata: I see.
Yuki: A, Arata-san! I'm sorry!!
Arata: Hm...?
Yuki: Even though you weren't feeling well, I just said things that pushed you...
Yuki: If I'd noticed sooner and had you rest, this wouldn't have...
Arata: Yuki, you...
Yuki: Yes!
Arata: You really are too naive.
Yuki: Huh...?
Arata: That was just losing my balance when I dove.
Yuki: But I heard it from you, Arata-san.
Yuki: That diving is really dangerous...
Yuki: The swim club members and Dr. Matsuoka said you weren't badly hurt, but what if...
Arata: I'm fine.
Arata: Fortunately, I wasn't badly hurt.
Arata: It's not like you pushed me off, you have nothing to apologize for.
Yuki: But...
Arata: I'm the one who should apologize.
Yuki: Huh...?
Arata: I'm sorry for taking my anger out on you before.
Yuki: Arata-san...
(Yuki: What is this feeling...?)
(Yuki: If he's going to apologize like this, I feel like I would rather he be angry at me for being insensitive.)
Yuki: I didn't feel like you were taking your anger out on me.
(Yuki: Instead, I was glad that I knew your feelings.)
(Yuki: That's why...)
Yuki: Please don't look like that...
Arata: Look like that? Am I making a weird expression?
Yuki: No. It's not weird, but...
Yuki: Even though you were in so much pain, right now... you look like an empty shell...
Arata: ...An empty shell, huh.
Arata: That fits me perfectly right now.
Arata: No.
Arata: Maybe I've been an empty shell ever since that day...
Yuki: Arata-san. Um, that day...?
Arata: That day... It's something that happened when I was little.

CG: ocean pier
Arata: Because of my parents' work, every summer break I was always left at my Grandma's house.
Arata: The ocean was beautiful and there were several small fishing boats tied to the pier.
Arata: It was that sort of country town.
Arata: My parents would come pick me up at the end of August. I spent most of summer break there.
end CG

Yuki: That sounds like a wonderful summer break.
Yuki: Knowing you, I'm sure you swam in the ocean every day, didn't you?
Yuki: Diving into the ocean and swimming a lot.
Yuki: You must have had a lot of fun everyday.
Arata: No.
Arata: At first, I didn't want to go and I was bored.
Yuki: Really?
Arata: When I was young, I still hadn't started learning to swim.
Arata: And I was an outsider there.
Arata: I was always lonely.
Arata: But only Naoki talked to me.
Yuki: Naoki... Is that the person you met yesterday?
Arata: Right.
Arata: He was a little older than me, but Naoki befriended me.
Arata: And he introduced me to the other kids.
Arata: Everyone, meet Arata, he said.
Arata: He was popular and had a lot of friends.
Arata: The older kids adored him and the little kids relied on him.
Arata: That someone like that had befriended me specially. I felt a bit proud.
Yuki: I see...
Arata: I made friends the same age, but Naoki was always with me.
Arata: Over the years, eventually, the two of us started to meet alone.
Arata: When he first kissed me, it was sudden, but I didn't dislike it...
Yuki: ...
(Yuki: Kissed...)
(Yuki: Arata-san and that man...)
Arata: That's when I realized.
Arata: I wasn't normal.
Yuki: Not normal, what is that?
Arata: I had no interest in girls yet back then.
Arata: But I didn't think much about having a girlfriend someday either.
Arata: I was still a child.
Arata: But being kissed by him, I didn't mind it...
Arata: Far from disliking it, it made me happy, that's when I realized.
Arata: I was different from everyone. I liked guys...
Yuki: ...
Arata: Since back then, Naoki had someone he was going out with.
Yuki: Huh...? Even though he kissed you?
Arata: He didn't really clearly say they were going out.
Arata: But you could tell when you saw them, and everyone said so.
Arata: He had that sort of childhood friend. It was his fiancee we met yesterday.
Yuki: Oh no...
Arata: Still, Naoki preferred meeting me secretly over her.
Arata: Naoki said not to tell anyone we were meeting.
Arata: He swore me to secrecy.
Arata: That made me happy.
Arata: Even though it was a relationship we had to keep secret, still Naoki felt he wanted to see me.
Arata: We couldn't let anyone see where we were meeting.
Arata: So we always met at a rocky area on the beach that adults said we should stay away from because it was dangerous.

CG: cliff
Arata: It was an unpopular place away from the swimming area.
Arata: There was a bit of a cliff and even at high tide, it was about ten meters to the ocean.
Arata: I guess it was just a little higher than the diving board.
Arata: Because of the tides and the terrain, the waves were always violent.
Arata: The waves that beat on the rocks broke and turned to spray.
Arata: But to a kid, that made it more fascinating.
Arata: Diving from the cliff into the sea had become a test of courage among the local kids.
Arata: Everyone attempted it once, but it seemed like there weren't very many who actually dove.
Arata: Naoki bragged that he had dived from there.
Arata: So he asked me if I could dive from there too.
Arata: I... didn't think about being afraid at all, I just said I could do it, just wanting Naoki's approval.
end CG

Yuki: Is that when you started diving?
Arata: No, not at all.
Arata: I said I could do it, and immediately dove right in front of Naoki.
Yuki: W, were you okay!?
Arata: I was successful somehow.
Arata: I dove and sank deep underwater, but I immediately floated up to the surface and I waved to Naoki.
Arata: But then I was swallowed by a wave and lost my balance...
Arata: I struggled desperately, but my body was pulled steadily away from the cliff.
Arata: Soon my arms and legs got heavy and even keeping my head above water became harder and harder.
Arata: I don't really remember much after that.
Arata: When I came to, I was lying in a hospital bed.
Arata: I heard later that I was pulled out of the ocean and taken to the hospital with a high fever.
Yuki: Um... did Naoki-san save you?
Arata: ...I don't really remember.
Arata: But I have the strong impression of hands grasping my arms and pulling me up.
Yuki: I see...
(Yuki: He saved him.)
(Yuki: That's right.)
(Yuki: Someone drowning right in front of him, and it was someone special to him.)
(Yuki: It's only natural that he'd try to save him.)
Arata: That time, I sank into the dark ocean.
Arata: He called to me and reached out, and he saved me.
Arata: I didn't know if it was a dream or reality, but it's always... been salvation to me.
Yuki: ...But you haven't met Naoki-san for all this time, right?
Yuki: Why...?
Arata: When I was delirious with fever, Naoki only visited me once.
Arata: I opened my eyes when someone called the name 'Arata' and he was next to me.
Arata: My grandma who had stayed with me the whole time wasn't there.
Arata: We were alone.
Arata: Naoki looked upset.
Arata: When I woke up, it was the first thing he said.
Arata: Let's stop meeting alone, he said.
Arata: And don't tell anyone about that time, he said.
Yuki: No way! You nearly drowned, and even while you were in the hospital...
Yuki: Suddenly saying to not meet anymore... it's too one-sided!!
Arata: ...
Arata: But Naoki said what he had to say, then hurried and left.
Arata: I couldn't believe it.
Arata: It was a dream. It was a nightmare I had while I was delirious with fever.
Arata: I desperately tried to convince myself that's what it was.
Arata: But even after I left the hospital, Naoki didn't visit me even once.
Arata: Even if I tried to go see him, I was told he was out and Naoki avoided me all summer long.
Arata: I also left messages at his house, but he didn't return my calls.
Arata: Since the summer of that year, until my Grandma collapsed recently, I hadn't gone to that town even once.
Arata: To that town where he lived...
Yuki: ...So that's what happened.
(Yuki: Being separated that way from the first person he liked.)
Yuki: Um, Naoki-san... he said to not meet because he regretted what happened, right?
Yuki: Well, you dove into the sea because Naoki-san told you to, didn't you?
Yuki: That you were put in danger because of him.
Yuki: ...Then, you two didn't really part because you disliked each other...
Arata: ...I wish it had been like that.
Arata: But it wasn't.
Yuki: Huh?
Arata: Yesterday, seeing Naoki's face after so long, I finally remembered what happened back then.

CG: ocean
Arata: When I was drowning in the ocean, I was pushed back by the waves and was being swept out to sea.
Arata: I struggled in a daze and finally, I was able to cling to a rock which was barely rising from the ocean.
Arata: It was a big rock and I somehow managed to climb onto it and sat in a depression on top.
Arata: But beneath the cliff there was a strong ebb tide, and I had ended up pretty far from the cliff.
Arata: I could see Naoki on top of the cliff.
Arata: I waved to Naoki.
Arata: I'm here. I'm okay, so come help me.
Arata: ...After wandering around a little, Naoki went off somewhere.
Yuki: Where...?
Arata: I was sure he went to call an adult.
Arata: That would be best. I was sure that would have been safer than overdoing it trying to help me.
Arata: That's what I believed and I just waited, huddling myself up.
Arata: But no matter how long I waited, no one came to help me.
Arata: The sun went down and it started to get dark, and no one...
Arata: Even though it was summer, I was soaked.
Arata: The waves just kept coming so I couldn't get dry.
Arata: When the sun went down, it got colder and colder.
Arata: The wind and the rain mercilessly beat my chilled body.
Arata: If this was how things were going to be, I wished I had done my best to swim while I still had strength, even if it was harsh.
Arata: Right, it was much too late for regrets.
Arata: When it was pitch black all around me, I reached the limit of my strength...
Arata: I started to doze off.
Yuki: And help...?
Arata: Suddenly, a really bright light shone on me.
Arata: Someone, a man's voice, called out my name...
Arata: Finally he came back. Naoki came to save me.
end CG

Arata: That's what I thought as I lost consciousness.
Yuki: I'm really glad Naoki-san came to help you.
Arata: No, the one who saved me back then wasn't Naoki.
Yuki: ...Oh, it was an adult that Naoki-san called?
Arata: Not that either.
Yuki: Huh!? Then, who...?
Arata: When I didn't come back even though it was dark, my grandma got worried and searched for me along with the neighbors.
Arata: And some guys came out and said they had seen me go towards the cliff.
Arata: They even sent a boat out to the cliff.
Yuki: Then, Naoki-san...
Arata: He didn't tell anyone.
Arata: We met at a place we shouldn't have gone to, to avoid being seen.
Arata: If he'd been asked what he was doing there, our relationship would have been discovered...
Arata: I'm sure he was afraid of that...
Yuki: No way!
Yuki: Then he abandoned you to save himself!!
Arata: You don't have to be so blunt.
Yuki: Oh... sorry... But...
Arata: But, it's true.
Arata: He cared about himself more than me.
Arata: That's why he left me behind and ran away.
Arata: And he purposely came to my hospital room to make me keep quiet.
Arata: But I couldn't believe it...
Arata: That's why I rewrote that memory to suit myself.
Arata: Naoki came to save me. I always convinced myself of that...
Arata: Being told goodbye like that. Even still, I liked him...
Yuki: Arata-san...
Arata: Later, everyone blamed me.
Arata: You should have known that it was dangerous and you shouldn't go there.
Arata: Why did you go there, my parents and the police questioned me and were angry.
Arata: But I couldn't say why.
Arata: Because I promised him I would keep our relationship secret.
Arata: I could never break that promise.
Yuki: You should have broken a promise like that!!
Yuki: He was the one you abandoned you before, didn't he!?
Yuki: Still, you're the only one everyone got mad at. That's really messed up!!
Arata: But I didn't say anything.
Arata: I didn't want to tell anyone anything.
Arata: Everyone was mad at me and I didn't say a word.
Arata: Everyone saw me as a stubborn, sulky, sullen child.
Arata: Still, I didn't say anything and soon everyone was creeped out by me.
Arata: But I was left alone.
Arata: ...Hey, Yuki. You said it, didn't you? That I should tell him my feelings.
Yuki: Yes...
Yuki: I'm sorry. I didn't know how you felt, Arata-san...
Arata: It's fine.
Arata: I was angry and ran away from you. I felt like, what was the use of telling you...
Arata: It was actually... because I was afraid of my own feelings.
Yuki: Afraid of your feelings?
Arata: Yeah.
Arata: Nothing is as ugly as my real feelings.
Arata: I loved him.
Arata: That's why I kept my promise and didn't reveal the secret to anyone.
Arata: I always believed in him.
Arata: But that was just me continuing to lie to myself.
Yuki: Arata-san...
Arata: ...Actually, Ah was bitter.
Arata: Ah couldn' stand how much Ah hated him.
Arata: Why'd he abandon me back then?
Arata: Even though he said he loved me.
Arata: Why'd he stop comin' to see me? It made me wanna scream.
Arata: Like this... I didn't want anyone to see me like this.
Arata: So shameful... ugly... I didn't want to let anyone see...
Yuki: ...
Arata: It hurt, I wanted to run, I wished I could just disappear.
Arata: Before I realized it, I was up on a diving board...
Arata: No matter what happened, when I was standing on a diving board, I always became calm.
Arata: Despite that, earlier... the moment I stood on the diving board, I got scared.
Arata: It was that time. Being left in the dark ocean, I remembered it as if it was happening.
Arata: All alone in the pitch black ocean...
Arata: Scared... lonely...
Arata: Cold... hurting...
Arata: No matter how loud I yelled, it didn't reach anyone.
Arata: There was absolutely no one to come to my rescue.
Arata: Seized with unrelenting fear, there was no way I could dive.
Arata: All I could do... was fall into the water...
Yuki: ...
Yuki: ...I wish you had said something...
Yuki: To that man yesterday, after all...
Yuki: You should have let it all out! When you saw him again yesterday, you should have confronted him about what happened!!
Yuki: Why did he leave you and run away!? That's so cowardly!!
Yuki: I'd never forgive him!
Yuki: Leaving you, Arata-san, and acting like nothing had ever happened!
Yuki: I couldn't forgive it!!
Yuki: He's... too cruel...
Arata: I'm not going to do that.
Yuki: Why!? You're the only one who's suffered, aren't you!!?
Yuki: You nearly died, and the adults got mad at you, and no one understood you.
Yuki: None of that's right!!
Arata: It's fine. The ocean is a scary place.
Arata: Back then, even if he clumsily tried to save me, we might have both been swept away by the waves.
Arata: As you can see, I was saved and survived.
Arata: So it doesn't matter anymore...
Yuki: No way... I can't accept it...
Yuki: After all, he...
Arata: Don't say any more.
Arata: You know what would happen if I let him have it about the past there yesterday.
Arata: In front of the girlfriend he's going to marry.
Arata: It's nothing but trouble.
Arata: If she doesn't have to know, she's better off never knowing.
Arata: Besides, he told us, didn't he?
Arata: He used the opportunity of what happened back then to become a lifeguard.
Arata: He seemed really proud.
Yuki: Right...
Arata: If he could say something like that to me, it's already in the past.
Arata: For Naoki, what he had with me is already settled and in the past.
Arata: Going out with me secretly, abandoning me in the ocean.
Arata: All of it. Really, all of it was over a long time ago...
Yuki: ...
(Yuki: What is this...?)
(Yuki: I'm all angry, but Arata-san is so calm...)
(Yuki: It hurts.)
(Yuki: It's too painful.)
(Yuki: Even though Arata-san should be angrier, he's so...)
(Yuki: He's so...)
Arata: Heh. Thinking he'd saved me was one heck of a misunderstanding.
Arata: He saved me when I was drowning in the ocean.
Arata: That was nothing more than a convenient illusion I created in my mind.
Arata: I'm a hopeless idiot, always waiting.
Yuki: Waiting...?
Arata: I was always waiting.
Arata: My diving was the idealized memories of that time.
Arata: As long as I kept doing it, maybe someday I could see him again.
Arata: The hand reaching out to help me, maybe someday I could reach it again with my own hand.
Arata: If I did that, then maybe I could change this world that seems sunken underwater.
Arata: Thinking that, I kept hoping and praying...
Arata: No matter what, I clung to diving.
Yuki: That's... the reason you kept diving, Arata-san?

Arata: If I just endured it those times, then I could continue diving.

(Yuki: The reason he kept enduring it, even though his sempai was doing cruel things to him...)
Arata: Yeah. But even that was all just my misunderstanding.
Arata: I dove so many times and it was all for nothing.
Yuki: Wait a minute! Please don't say it was for nothing!!
Arata: Why?
Yuki: Well, talking like that...
Yuki: Arata-san, didn't you always do your best to dive?
Yuki: Didn't you keep diving every single day, over and over!!?
Yuki: Practicing by yourself, even though you were badmouthed and it was hard to go to the swim club...
Yuki: Saying that was for nothing.
Yuki: You can't say that! Please don't throw it all away like that!!
Arata: But the reason I was doing my best was just a misunderstanding...
Arata: It's laughable. It's too funny.
Arata: ...It's ugly.
Arata: Disgraceful...
Yuki: It's not disgraceful!!
Yuki: Even if the reason you started was a misunderstanding, even if you think it's all for nothing, I don't think so!
Arata: Yuki. You're... still saying stuff like that?
Yuki: But, your diving isn't disgraceful at all.
Yuki: I didn't know until you taught me that it's harder than it looks, and it's a dangerous sport.
Yuki: But your diving is so beautiful and carefree that it doesn't seem that way at all...
Yuki: I felt I wanted to watch it forever, over and over!!
Yuki: Arata-san!!
Arata: ...
(Yuki: He's not responding.)
(Yuki: Is it no good?)
(Yuki: Am I not getting through to Arata-san no matter what I say?)
(Yuki: No matter how desperate I am...)
(Yuki: Desperate?)
(Yuki: Why have I become so desperate towards Arata-san?)

Yuki: Because of that weird rumor, you have to practice alone. You can't leave things like that, can you?
Yuki: After all, I don't want to see you suffering, Arata-san.

(Yuki: I feel like I've just been saying the same things over and over.)
(Yuki: But, I...)
Yuki: I like it.
(Yuki: I like Arata-san...)
(Yuki: That's why I'm so concerned about Arata-san, so much it hurts...)
Yuki: I like you diving, Arata-san...
(Yuki: Since he teamed up with me in the Bell One, the whole time I've watched Arata-san.)
(Yuki: Always joking around, and acting cheerful.)
(Yuki: Smiling, even though he actually has... unpleasant memories, and pain.)
(Yuki: Even though I want to do something for Arata-san.)
(Yuki: I hate feeling pathetic, that I nothing I say is getting through to him...)
(Yuki: It's because I like Arata-san that it hurts so much.)
Yuki: Hey, Arata-san.
Arata: ...
Yuki: You like diving, don't you?
Yuki: No matter what reason you started with, if you didn't like it, you couldn't practice every day like that.
Yuki: So, you'll continue from now on, won't you?
Arata: It's impossible.
Yuki: Impossible...
Arata: ...Earlier when I was standing on the diving board, the water in the pool looked pitch black.
Arata: Even though I've been doing it for so long... it's the first time I felt so much fear.
Arata: It's impossible now. I can't even stand on the diving board in that condition.
Yuki: Oh no...
Yuki: Maybe you're afraid because you fell just now.
Yuki: But I'm sure you can conquer it, Arata-san!
Yuki: Well, you told me, didn't you? That the moment the feeling of fear disappears, your body and mind become as light as air!
Arata: ...
Yuki: Arata-san...
Arata: I can't continue diving...
Arata: ...So I can't stay at this school anymore.
Yuki: Huh...?
Arata: I came here to dive.
Arata: So... I'm no longer qualified to be here, there's no point.
Arata: ...Yuki.
Yuki: Yes.
Arata: Leave me alone.
Yuki: But...
Arata: ...I want to be alone.
Yuki: Oh...
Yuki: ...Um, is there anything I can do?
Yuki: Anything at all...
Arata: No... Oh...
Yuki: What is it? Please ask me anything.
Arata: The cats.
Yuki: Cats?
Arata: Right. The cat litter.
Arata: Could I ask you to clean it from now on?
Yuki: Of course. But, why, all of a sudden?

Arata: If Arata wasn't here anymore.
Arata: Can I ask you to do it for me then?

(Yuki: Arata-san... no way.)
(Yuki: No way he's serious...)
Arata: Thank you. Then...
Yuki: Um!
Arata: I'm going to sleep a little longer, so leave me alone...
Yuki: Oh...
Yuki: Yes... Please have a good rest...

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